In part 2 of Pretension's Friday evening, we adjourned to the Shaw Lido to catch the 9:30pm showing of Mad about English. This is a comic documentary about China's mad mad efforts to master English in time for the Beijing Olympics. Directed by ex-CNN journalist and Singaporean Lian Pek (real name: Pek Siok Lian), the movie is by turns hilarious and heart-warming.

The 80+ minute movie casts the spotlight on 6 main characters:

• Li Yang, the "crazy english teacher" in the style of Anthony Robbins, whose inspirational mission is to teach english to more than a milion chinese people;
• Qi Qi; a 12 year-old girl enrolled in one of Li Yang's English Boot camps
• Meng; Beijing taxi driver who is desperately trying to master english so he can drive foreigners around during the Olympics
• Jason Yang; 73 year-old retireee who is an Olympics volunteer and founded of the Golden Years English Salon for senior citizen english learners
• Dr David Tool; the american english "grammar cop" who travels Beijing correcting signs and menus
• Liu Wenli; Beijing's "best policeman"; a cop who loves to impress tourists with his mastery of many languages and accents.

There are also numerous supporting characters, including P's favourite, elderly Traditional Chinese Medicine doctor, Mary Tu. Mary is first seen reading english medical phrases out of a book, including such gems as "Have your bowels opened today? What colour are your stools?". Now there's a conversation starter!

P was most inspired by Jason Yang's journey. He started the Golden Years English Salon at the age of 68 and persevered in his drive to learn english so he could serve as a volunteer and a guide during the Olympics, despite admitting to himself that his memory was spotty and things that were learned in the morning might be forgotten by nightfall. How many elderly retirees simply sit at home and watch TV? Not this guy - he really proves the point that you're only as old as you feel. The other person P found admirable was Qi Qi. Despite being much younger than most of the teenagers and twenty-somethings enrolled at the Boot Camp, she finds the strength to carry on; declaiming her English sentences with the best of them despite lack of sleep and starvation (students have to pass tests to eat). P's not sure about crazy Li Yang's training methods 'though; screaming out phrases like that all day seems calculated to erode your vocal cords and is downright scary when 10,000 people are doing it all at the same time.

Meng the taxi driver was just plain hilarious in his utter incomprehension of basic english phrases. Pity the tourists in his cab! Still at least he did put in the effort. Liu Wenli on the other hand seemed to have no trouble, even if his efforts were inspired by what seemed to be an unfortunate selection of New York-based movies. P was really impressed by how he had mastered basic phrases in several languages including German, Spanish and Japanese!

Of course, a major character in the film is Beijing itself and the image it presents through its buildings, signs, sights and people. Pretensions loved the bizarro menus in the film that had phrases like "outraged bullfrog" and "human flesh". P can't quite remember all the howlers but she does remember seeing a sign in a restaurant in Shanghai reading "Consummation Corner". For more Chinese menu howlers, please check out this site.

Mad about English is a fun movie, and reveals a side of Beijing very different to the glamour of the Olympic stadia and the glitter of the Opening Ceremony - do catch the movie if it comes to a cinema near you or at least borrow the DVD!